Friday, February 27, 2009

Why Do People Treat Me Badly?

People have multiple identities

When you play with a little child you will find yourself talking and acting in a childish way, When someone bothers you at the street you might find yourself shouting at him and when you are with the person you love you might find yourself cheerful and encouraging. So which one is your true personality? Which behavior best describes you? Are you that childish grown up who plays with the kids, are you that angry man who shouts at everyone or are you that encouraging lover?

Actually you are all of these, but you tend to change your identity according to the situation you are in.

Why do people treat me badly?

So what does this have to do with people treating you badly and what's the relationship of such identities with their way of treatment?

Just as you have multiple identities people do have multiple identities too. Based on the way you treat them or based on the words you say you can trigger any of their dormant identities and so find them acting in a different way.

Just go to any stranger and punch him in his face then see how his reaction will be. I know that usually you don't punch people in the face and that this is not the reason they treat you badly but sometimes a simple word that you say could be more powerful than a directed punch in the face.

Some people hate criticism, others hate seeing people talking about themselves while a third group hate those who don't give them space. Whenever you do something that somebody hates even if you view it as a trivial matter then the response is going to be in the form of a bad treatment.

Understand people if you want them to treat you in a good way

A friend of mine is egocentric and very showy; he feels that people insult him when they question his competence. As a person who understands how others think, I try not to say anything that makes him think that I am not acknowledging his skills or abilities. Of course I am not forced to do so but I do it on intention because I want to maintain my good relationship with that person.

In short, if you want people to treat you in a good way then you should understand their personalities by knowing the exact triggers that causes them to change their peaceful identities into horrible ones.

What if they always treat me badly?

So what if those people always treat you badly without you doing a single action or saying a single word? This might mean that those people prefer the evil identity or the one that results in an unwelcoming behavior, this should disqualify them from being your friends. The world is big, and unless you find people who do respect you and love you for who you are then you should be looking for other friends somewhere else.

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