Sunday, June 28, 2009

Positive Thinking - Self Help Tips

I am a huge advocate of positive thinking. I apply it in every aspect of my life. But lately, I have been wondering, is all this positive thinking starting to cloud my judgment? Am I so focused on the positive that I am just not in touch with reality anymore? When does positive thinking become delusion?

It all started about two weeks ago when I started to have a dangerous moment of self reflection. If someone asked me at that point, 'Are you happy with your life?' I would have said 'Sure, pretty much'. I would like to be less busy, I would like to have a bit more time, I would like to see my friends more, but generally, I am pretty positive about where I am with life. The problem is that then I started to question whether that positive feeling was in fact justified, or was it simply a state of mind.

So, I started to examine the facts, which is even more dangerous than self reflection! I started to look at my life as it stands and compared it with how I wanted it to be. I mentally skipped through every aspect of my life; relationship, friends, family, work and self. At the end of it all, low and behold, I wasn't feeling very positive anymore. It was actually a fairly sad and dreary tale.

Now don't get my wrong. I am not saying that everything in my life is awful or that there is nothing good that is happening for me. But, when I looked at where I am and where I wanted to be, there was a pretty big gap between the two. So, for someone that thought life was pretty good and easy, I was suddenly forced to consider that perhaps it was not.

Firstly, I thought about whether my goals were realistic or just down right ludicrous and some did not pass the test. If I did everything that I wanted to, I would never sleep and even then would struggle to get through it all, which resulted in reestablishing my expectations. But, even after that, I realized that there were parts of my life that I wanted to believe were amazing and fantastic, but when I looked at the cold hard truth, were a far cry from what I wanted them to be. For all my focusing on the positive, I had failed to see that the negatives were actually things that mattered to me and simply ignoring them would not make them go away. In this case, I had been so hell-bent on looking at the positive; I was deluding myself and damaging my life along the way.

Armed with this new awareness, I have since been forced to conduct a major review and the outcome continues to remain unknown. And, (surprise, surprise), I feel pretty positive about it! As I said, I am a huge fan of positive thinking. It can be the difference between amazing or ordinary, sparkling or flat. I truly believe that it is a conscious choice and way of life that drives satisfaction and well-being. But used in the wrong way, as I have now learned, it can result in misguided choices and poor direction.

I have absolutely no idea what the answers are for me right now. I am in a fairly confused state as a result of all of this turmoil. However I do believe that I will make all my dreams come true one way or the other, and that is something to feel positive about. So with that in mind, I will continue to bubble along and try to remember my important lesson. Stay positive, but do not lose sight of what is real!

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