Sunday, April 26, 2009

Overcoming Social Anxiety - 6 Important Tips

Social anxiety is a horrific and life consuming state to be in. It can often feel that there is no way to change the thoughts of distress, humiliation, and fear. Fortunately there is a way, quite a few of them in fact.

There are many different techniques, and they appear to work for different people. Your goal is to find which method helps you. Here we focus on six tips that may help point you in the right direction.

Tip #1: Stop Focusing On What You Don't Want

The mere thought of what a social situation might lead to use to send me scurrying back home. What if this happened? What if that happened?

The more you think about something, the more you will attract it. It is time to stop focusing on all the things you don't want, as this will not help you overcome it. From now on, start focusing on what you DO want.

Write down how you imagine your life without social anxiety. Get it down on paper to turn it into a goal, rather than a mere fantasy floating around in your head.

Tip #2: Do Something Crazy

Whenever you feel yourself slipping back into that horrible feeling of being anxious, do something completely unexpected. Your subconscious is expecting you to start quivering in fear, so it won't know which way to turn when you start singing, thinking random thoughts, imagining everyone as cartoons, or start pulling your socks over your head.

This sudden change in behaviour gives yourself a bit of a jolt and can quickly change how you feel for that moment.

Tip #3: Be Consistent

Everyday, make a difference. Do something that will work towards you overcoming social anxiety, even if it is small. These will all add up and can completely change your life around. Keep a journal of your achievements. Always be on a quest to constantly improve yourself.

When you do something difficult, such as making a telephone call or going to a meeting, immediately reward yourself. Setting up a reward system can really motivate you and keep you on track.

Tip #4: Make It a Win-Win Situation

When someone with social anxiety thinks something went wrong, they will often dwell on it for hours, weeks, years on end. They relive the situation over and over and cringe with regret every time the thought appears.

Change your view on situations. You have probably heard the story of Thomas Edison. Apparently he failed again and again in inventing a properly working light bulb. Was it failure in his eyes? No! He just discovered 2000 ways not to make a light bulb.

So if something goes wrong, use it as a great learning opportunity! Many successful people will tell you that failure is how you learn. So then, it isn't really failure is it?

Ask yourself, "What can I learn from this situation?" Find opportunity in what doesn't go to plan. You can't lose!

Tip #5: Remember That You Are Responsible

No one else can make you overcome social phobia. We can help you along the way and point you in the right direction, but in the end, only you can overcome it.

Social anxiety doesn't get easier with age. It is only when you decide to make that commitment that you will be able to beat it. Remember that you are responsible. You have a choice.

Tip #6: Repeat an Affirmation

When things are going wrong, start repeating an affirmation in your head. Tell yourself that it is all going exactly how you want it to. Find an affirmation that suits you and say it over and over again.

This is something that will grow stronger with practice. The more you do this, the more effective it will be. Your subconscious doesn't know the difference between fantasy and reality, therefore any information you feed to it, it will believe (especially if you feed it this information constantly).

Jane Renshaw recovered from social anxiety disorder after nearly 20 years of suffering. She is the author of "How to Overcome Social Anxiety in 5 Easy Steps". This ebook puts emphasis on how even the worst sufferers can overcome their social anxiety permanently. You can get more information at (http://www.social-anxiety-revealed.com)

Choices We Make In Life

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